A server by any other name…

3 01 2012

This is most likely going to be one of those you-had-to-have-been-there or a part-of-the-Dyer-family-to-get-a-kick-out-of-it stories, but I’m going to tell it anyway.

My dad and I were having a very late afternoon lunch at a Luby’s Cafeteria in San Antonio on New Year’s Day. Dad had gumbo soup and the tea server/waiter (a man in his 30s, I’m guessing) came by and asked him if he wanted crackers. Dad said no, but later he motioned the server over and said he would take them after all. The server came back, dropped off crackers, and went on his merry way.

When we finished eating, my dad mentioned that he would like to leave a tip for him, but he only had a $20 bill and that seemed a bit exorbitant for someone just bringing crackers. I pulled out two dollars and set them down. My dad said, “motion Homer over here and give him his tip.” I was a little mortified. I was not going to call the guy Homer!

Here’s the scoop on that name—whenever my dad doesn’t know someone’s name or wants to assign a name to someone, he uses the old-fashioned name, Homer. When someone cuts him off in traffic, he’ll say, “way to go Homer,” or when he wants his grandson Brennan to bring him something, he’ll call him Homer (my nephew thinks he’s referring to Homer Simpson). I wasn’t about to call this guy Homer because that wasn’t his name, so I just ignored my dad’s prompt, hoping he would forget.

He motioned the guy over and said, “this is for bringing me crackers, Homer.” I held my breath, watching the man’s face to see if he was puzzled or offended. He picked up the two dollars and said, “Thanks! Happy New Year to you both!” and walked away. As he walked off, I got a quick glance of his name tag. I’ll give you three guesses what the guy’s name was (and the first two don’t count).

Yes, you guessed it—the guy’s name was actually Homer! As we got up from the table, I told my dad that I thought he was just being rude by assigning his generic “Homer” to the guy. We got a good laugh out of that and figured the odds of that happening again are astronomical.

Sigh. It takes so very little to amuse me. 😉


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6 responses

3 01 2012
Jeff Evans

That reminds me of going to a Red Lobster 20+ years ago with a friend and my dad. We had a very pretty, very good waitress who really added to how much fun the meal was. At the end we all sort of got separated between paying the bill, going to the bathroom, getting a toothpick, whatever…and each ended up thinking we had forgotten to tip the waitress and were mortified at the thought. So we each ended up separately finding her and giving her money and didn’t realize till we had gotten back in the car and were on our way. I’m sure the waitress got quite the kick out of it all…and she certainly got one hell of a good tip.

3 01 2012
cindydyer

Good story, Jeff! You definitely made her day.

3 01 2012
Betty Londergan

What a great story — I LOVE little coincidences like this! Sounds like you and your dad are having a great time .. and boy am I jealous of the Luby’s gumbo!!

5 01 2012
Chloe

haha thats funny 🙂

5 01 2012
Mary Ellen Ryall

This is a roar. I really would like to know your dad. He has such a dry sense of humor that it just tickles my funny bone. Be sure to tell him.

Also your photo of the luscious tulip with foam and dew is extraordinary.

5 01 2012
Steve Schwartzman

That’s a great story; if I were still teaching probability I’d bring it in to my students.

Steve Schwartzman
http://portraitsofwildflowers.wordpress.com

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